In the last two weeks I’ve come across two ladies in their thirties who felt under pressure to have a child outside of wedlock because “our community puts pressure”. On one forum another lady claims that her mother was very happy about her pregnancy announcement because lots of much younger single girls have had kids and she was left out. Apparently her mother jumped for joy because she thought she was infertile, which is shocking. This begs the question: Is it really true that in the black community it is expected that a woman who has ‘completed her studies and working is expected to have a child – married or not? I don’t think so.
I do not understand how an independent woman in her thirties would find it difficult to fend off comments from insensitive relatives snooping into her affairs. We are talking about a lady who is obviously successful, has good taste, knows what she wants from a husband (if she chooses this path) and won’t settle. I say to all the ladies (single, married with children or single with children): When you get home at night, no relative will be there to help you face the life you were apparently pressured into. Take decisions that you will be happy to go home to. Single parenthood should be your free choice.
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